Marcel revised his speech to make it more concise since the parameters call for one minute (with a bit of grace period additionally if needed). We discussed audience and how the thought must be that the speech is all about them. Therefore, in editing, we combined ideas from various sentences and avoided first person to a greater degree. We also discussed the story Marcel will include since the focus is on storytelling in his blog. Marcel needs one, not two, stories, with more action verbs (eliminate the passive) and a tiny cliffhanger so that the audience wants to hear the conclusion -- what happened, what happened? In this way, he demonstrates storytelling rather than talking about it. The pathos needs to be built in, and the audience engaged. This is not easy to do in one minute, but it can be done! Marcel has a list of things to consider for his revision. The firm accomplishment today was cutting the intro to half the time without losing any ideas, and making it more audience-based.